Q: Should we have a prenuptial agreement?
A: Prenuptial agreements are taking marriages by storm; unfortunately, they’re messing with people’s understanding of what marriage is. It seems that few people believe in the permanence of marriage anymore. Nothing can kill romance faster than the word “prenup,” however, that is becoming more and more common.
Prenups are offensive for several reasons:
They assume divorce. A prenuptial agreement is a legal contract that situates both “parties” comfortably if a split were to happen.
They are based on fear—fear of being burned, hurt, or ripped-off. But fear is the opposite of love. If couples truly love each other enough to justify getting married, then their love should overcome their fear. In its place should be trust.
They support the attitude to trust no one because no one seems trustworthy. That’s a bad way to start a marriage!
They undermine marriage’s foundational qualities: trust, faithfulness, commitment, mutual respect, mutual honor, a heart that yields to the Spirit of God, and a spirit of obedience (and not rebellion). What is the need for self-protection when the one person you have committed to protect is your spouse?
God says divorce is not an option, so why plan for it? Reasons for prenups are lies. The truth is, the best way to protect your family and your assets is to be committed to your marriage. Don’t marry unless you plan on entering into a covenant marriage in which divorce is not an option. The best way to honor your family (parents, children, etc.) is to honor your marriage commitment, bound by a holy God.
*For more practical marriage advice, check out The Great Marriage Q&A Book. It's available in our online bookstore!