There are four things that we encourage all couples to try in their marriage for a wonderfully connected relationship and a more loving home. If you take these biblical elements to heart and adjust even ten degrees, we believe your marriage will be stronger than ever.
- Give Grace - The first thing that we need to do is give grace to our mates and allow them to be different. Your husband is not your girlfriend, nor do you want him to be. You want him to be masculine and winsome and romantic. But a man is going to express himself differently than you, my dear sister in Christ. He is not a woman and, indeed, you are not a man.
- Be Vulnerable - In a grace-based home we need to be vulnerable. That means take off the mask, own up to our hurt, take the responsibility where we have been critical, where we have been harsh, or where we have been authoritarian instead of gracious.
- Allow Mistakes - This is a home where we need to give grace and allow our mates to make mistakes. In a grace-based home my mate is not going to be perfect, but I realize that my mate is not my enemy. My mate is the love of my life. Where do you need to go back to your mate and say, “I came down on you too hard, will you forgive me? You can make mistakes, because I’ve made mistakes too.” And it’s through being different and vulnerable and making mistakes that indeed we must be candid.
- Tell the Truth - We are told in Scripture to always tell the truth, but just surround it with love. Be loving in telling the truth. In your being honest, make sure your mate always comes out feeling stronger, like they will always be supported and you are their best cheerleader—but tell the truth in love. You tell the truth because Jesus tells us to take the gird, the belt of truth, and wear it, and because you want the very best for your mate and your marriage.
These elements are four steps in the right direction toward a more connected marriage and grace-filled home. We encourage you to practice these steps today!